灵魂的“银带”卡卡

作者:黄九菡人气:795更新:2021-07-14 16:00:14

                       灵魂的“银带”
 

        我看到天空铁青的脸 ,闪过一抹季节峰刃上的寒光,我想到了冷,更毫无征兆的想到了您。
        很想写点关于你的那么写点点滴滴 ,可困于那时还有课 ,便推到现在 。
 
         时光神奇,曾经模糊的慢慢清晰,曾经清晰的渐渐模糊。
 
        周遭的一切都很详实亦很安静 ,感觉自己的灵魂已经在四周悠然飞翔,真给人以鼓励啊,让我有一种欲罢不能的冲动 ,又或者说是动力。自由的灵魂是纵横捭阖 、飞扬游曳的,按照藏传佛教的说法,灵魂被称为“银带 ” ,当人们入睡的时候,“银带”是游离于人体之外的,它的遭际变形成了梦 ,所以梦和现实隔得并不远,也许只隔着一扇窗 。但对于一个长期不怎么做梦的人来说,这条银带已经捂的我都快踹不过气来 ,这种痛苦是难以释怀的 ,所以我也就壮着胆子做一个一直都想做的梦吧,只因我渴望那种现实 。希望佛祖不要惩罚我。
 
   黄昏了,我和爹爹(我的家乡都这样称呼爷爷)正从家里裹挟着棉被往打谷场赶 ,我和爹爹是去守场,因为刚打的稻子如小山般堆积在打谷场上,怕有些不安分的人 ,偷。这是我是最高兴的,你可以在这样的时候做很多的事,想象一下:远离村庄 ,在一个周围树荫婆娑,稻香纷飞的野外,你所看到的是一望无际的田野 ,你所听到的是欢快清脆的鸟鸣,你所闻到的更是醇厚携里的秋香,甚至 ,你能尝到很多野果子 。很多的很多 ,现在是一种奢望,但在那时确实唾手可得的。我会和爹爹把打谷场里脱穗的谷子抱很多到我们搭建的简易帐篷内,直到把它铺的满满的、厚厚的 ,然后在垫上那件床单,这种床毫无疑问是全球限量版的,只此一件 ,别无他卖。想着想着忍不住就想躺在上面,但现在还不行啊,因为我还要去把牛从河旁边牵过来 ,对于农村人来说,牛就是他们的命根子 。
 
       牵着那头年龄比我还大的老黄牛就这样慢悠悠的回荡在归“屋”的路上,直到夕阳把我和老黄的身影拉的老长老长 ,尽管这一幕总让我想起一幅画中的一个牧童坐在牛背上吹着笛子缓缓而行,好不令人向往,我也试过 ,可那次却摔倒得很惨 ,因为我忽略了一个问题,人家牧童坐的是一头水牛,我家的却是头黄牛 ,黄牛是不允许其他的动物跨在它背上的,尽管被驯化了几千年,但这一点恐怕人类是改变不了的 ,沐浴着夕阳的挥洒,就这样慢慢的走着走着,走过了黄昏 ,走来了繁星,走来了爹爹的体温。
 
        爹爹是1930年生的,可是他本人恐怕不知道自己究竟是哪年出生的了 ,为什么呢,原因其实也很简单,每当我问他老人家是什么时候出生的 ,他总是说:我是民国二十一年的 ,你说我是那一年的?不想,我这一问,竟又以一一问的形式把我打回来 ,小时候只能怪自己见识小,知识层面薄,老是不懂民国是什么 ,更无谈什么民国二十一年,当然也就不知道爹爹究竟是哪年出生,等到大点才知道在中华人民共和国之前有个中华民国 ,其实现在的台湾依旧称自己是中华民国,不过这就又是后话啦,爹爹是在中华民国的时候出生的 ,那时的纪年法都是民国多少年多少年纪年的,爹爹没读过书,这样说也就是必然的了。我老是在想 ,爷爷经历了多么多我只能在历史课本上才能读到的东西啊 ,不得不说,有时人的经历就是一部看不完的历史,这种诠释在爹爹的身上演绎的活灵活现 。
 
        其实自打从小起 ,就一直和爹爹一起睡,这种状况一直持续到我读高中,但爹爹肯定是异常想念我的 ,以至于第二天立即要跟我讲电话,问我睡的踏实否,不记得当时是怎么回答的 ,却记得爹爹的这一问至今仍在心底回荡。那么爷俩晚间的谈话就必是不可少的啦,爹爹本来就不是一个健谈的人,但在月明昏黑的晚上却总是兴致勃勃 ,讲个不停,或许这与他们老人家睡眠少有关,但我与我自己那刨根问底的功力也是有关的。放着这么好的教材不翻 ,简直就是对现实历史的亵渎啊 。
 
        爹爹会讲他被逼着给小鬼子修炮楼 ,当苦力的故事,而且总是怀着很大的感慨,我知道这种背后的酸楚 ,爹爹说他那时总是吃不饱,空着肚子去干活,额的眼冒金星你也得坚持干 ,不然就会招致鬼子的一顿暴打,甚至枪毙,对于一个十三四岁的孩子来说 ,这无疑是残酷的,但这便是历史,活生生的历史 ,来自爹爹身上的历史。所以爹爹每每看到抗日题材电视剧中的日本人是总是气愤的说到:连鬼子都冒看到,还演个木事鬼子!这种心灵上的阴影是来自于早期心灵上不能弥补的创伤,纵然历史能冲淡一切 ,但这却无法从他老人家心灵内删除。这时我会马上调一个频道 ,如果有西游记我会调到那个台,他老人家一般不喜欢看电视,但只喜欢看孙悟空 ,而且是百看不厌啊!
 
        这些只是很多方面中的一个,爹爹的历史太悠久啦,虽然比不上一部中华五千年史 ,但在我眼里,爹爹却让我看到了一个不一样的历史,一种在书上读不到但在他身上可以触摸的到的历史 。
 
        爹爹还是会像往常一样给我讲他的“历史 ” ,我们躺在这张无比舒适的床上,在坍陷中渐渐靠的更紧,心也联系的越来越紧 ,听着爹爹讲的那些成年往事,我所触摸的到的是艰苦与坚持,这样苦难的日子就这样在爹爹的叙述中不紧不慢 ,不慌不忙地慢慢向我走来 ,当我仔细向它张望时,它又似乎隔着一层薄薄的轻纱,就这样一帘轻纱 ,硬生生的将我分离开来,隔纱看艰苦,不能说忧伤 ,更多的是一种淡淡的悲伤,在他们的世界里,永远都是对今天好日子与往昔艰辛的巨大反差所形成的隔膜感 。帐篷外的老黄牛莎莎咀嚼胃里的声音掺杂进来 ,很有节奏,寂静的夜,就这样被老黄牛一点一点咬破。
 
        而爹爹现在肯定没睡着 ,我想是的,结果也必然是这样,他老人间似乎在夜里从来就没有真真的睡过 ,毕竟 ,有时晚上做噩梦惊醒时喊爹爹,他会马上回答,问我怎么了 ,现在恐怕是享受不到这种待遇啦,但这时的爹爹是否会想起我这个孙子呢,过年回家 ,家里人为我重新布置了一个房间,我注意到虽然家里人很是高兴,但爹爹看上去却不是那么高兴 ,再也不会有人听自己讲故事啦,有时,老年人少了一个忠实的听众似乎就像夺了他们的精神来源。家里人说老年人有老气 ,难闻 。我想又不是你们闻,所以没有去新房,去爹爹的房间 ,虽然没有和爹爹一起睡 ,但至少我们在一个房间内,又可以触摸历史了,心中的喜悦顿时油然而生。
 
       冬天的晚上是枯燥的、单调的。这是书上说的 。
 
       而我现在要写下的是“昏暗的冬夜让思想有了前进的翅膀 ,在前进中停顿,在停顿中冥想。 ”的却,一切都静下来了 ,但不是那种空洞的静,而是一种清寥和空旷。
 
      我的“银带”要歇息了,带着美好的想象轻轻的落在我的脖颈 ,亲吻着我,抚摸着我 。

英译版本:

"Silver Belt"

I saw the sky of the sky, flashed the cold light on the season's peak, I thought of cold, more no signs. You.
I really want to write some about you to write some drops, you can be trapped in the time, and push it now.

The time is magical, and it has been blurred and clear, and it has gradually blurred.

Everything we have is very detailed, it feels that your soul is already flying around, I really give people encouragement, let me have a kind of urge to stop, or say that it is motivation. The freedom of the soul is in the vertical, flying tour, according to the Tibetan Buddhism, the soul is called "silver belt", when people fall asleep, "silver belt" is outside the human body, it is alive Dream, so dreams and reality are not far away, maybe only one window. But for a long time not to dream, I have been ignorant, this kind of pain is hard to let go, so I will have a dream that I have always want to do. Let's die because I am eager. I hope that the Buddha will not punish me.

Differently, I and my hometown were called the grandfather.) Was wrapped in the cotton, and I was going to the bar farm. I was going to the defending, because the rice is like a hill Stacked on the ceremony, afraid that some people who are unfortunate, steal. This is the most happy, you can do a lot of things like this, imagine: away from the village, in a shade of the shade, the wild in the wild, what you see is a wild field, you I heard the cheerful and crisp bird, and what you smell is more alcoholic, or even, you can taste a lot of wild fruits. A lot of many, now is a luxury, but it is really sure. I will take a lot of valleys who take the sublets in the Valley to take the simple tent we have built until they are full, thick, then on the mat, this bed is undoubted. Global limited edition, only one, don't sell. I want to think about I can't help but I want to lying on it, but now I can't do it, because I have to take the cattle from the river.Rural people come, cows are their life.

The old age, the old yellow cattle, the old yellow cattle, is the road to the "house", until the old age, the old, the old yellow figure, although this scene Let me think of a herd in a picture is sitting on the cow's back and blowing the flute. It is so uncomfortable. I have tried it, but I have fallen very bad, because I ignore a problem, The animal husbandarean is sitting a buffalo. My family is the head of the yellow cattle. The yellow cattle does not allow other animals to be on the back of it. Although they are domesticated for thousands of years, this is probably the human beings can't change, bathe, sunset Saving, so slowly, walking, walking at dusk, coming to the star, walking the body temperature.

Head is born in 1930, but he I am afraid I don't know what I am born. Why, the reason is also very simple. Whenever I ask his old man, he is always born, he is always Is it: I am in the Republic of China, you said that I am the year? I don't want, I will ask me in the form of one asked. I can only blame myself, knowledge. Thin level, I don't understand what the Republic of China is, and I don't talk about what the Republic of China is, of course, I don't know what year. I am born, wait until I know that there is a Chinese Republic of China before the People's Republic of China. Taiwan still said that he is the Republic of China, but this is later, it is born in the Republic of China, and the agenda of the Republic of China has not read the book, so It is inevitable to say. I am always thinking, how many grandfather has experienced that I can only read in the history class, I have to say that sometimes people's experience is a history of can't finish, this interpretation is interpretation Active flexible.

In fact, she will sleep with myself, I have been sleeping with myself, this situation has continued until I read high school, but I must be an exception to miss me, so I will talk to me immediately next day. Whether I sleep, I don't remember how to answer it, but I remember this question until the heart is still echoing. So, the talks in the evening will be indispensable. He is not a tentative person, but in the moon, the evening is always very prosperous, talking, maybe thisRelated to their old people sleep less, but I am also related to my own skill. It's just a violent history of reality.

Head, he will be forced to give a small devil to repair the gun, and then the hardship story, and always make a lot of emotions, I know that the sorrow behind this is, let him say he is always eating at that time. Unfair, empty belly to work, the amount of the eyes, you have to stick to dry, otherwise it will lead to a throwing of the devil, even shoot, for a thirteen-year-old child, this is undoubtedly cruel But this is history, living history, from history. So every time you see the Japanese in the anti-Japanese subject TV series, it is always angry: even the devils have seen, and also play a wooden devil! This shadow on this kind of mind is from the early heart, can't make up for the trauma. Even if the history can dilute everything, this is unable to delete from his elderly. At this time, I will call a channel immediately. If there is a West Travel, I will transfer to that stage. His old people generally don't like watching TV, but only like watching Sun Wukong, and it is not tired of it!

These are only one of many aspects, and the history is too long. Although it is not more than a Chinese history, but in my eyes, I have seen a different history. A history that does not read but can touch on his book.

Do you still tell me about his "history" as usual, we are lying on this incomparably comfortable bed, gradually relying tight in the collapse, and the heart is tightening. The adult past, the arrival of the adult, the arrival of the arrival is hard and persistent, so that the suffering days are not slow in the narrative, slowly come to me, when I carefully When you look forward to it, it seems to have a thin light yarn, so it's a curtain, hard to separate me, the gauze is hard, can't say sad, more is a faint Sadness, in their world, will always be a diaphragm that is formed today with the huge contrast of the past. The old yellow burr on the tent is dyed in the stomach, very rhythm, silent night, just bitten by the old ox.

,, now, now he is not asleep, I think isThe result is also the case. His old people seem to have never slept in the night. After all, sometimes when you have a nightmare to wake up, he will answer immediately. Ask me, now I am afraid I can't enjoy this. Treatment, but if you want to think about my grandson, go home for the New Year, the family re-arranged a room, I noticed that although the family was very happy, but he looked is not so happy, then There will be no one to listen to the story, sometimes, the elderly have a loyal audience seems to be like the source of spirit. The family said that the elderly have an old man, unpleasant. I don't want you to smell, so don't go to the new house, go to the room, although I haven't slept with you, but at least we can touch history, and you can have a good life.

The winter night is boring, monotonous. This is the book.

And I have to write down "Dully Winter Night Let the Thought have a wings, pause in the forward, meditation in the pause." The but, everything is quiet, but not that Variety of voids, but a clear and empty.

My "silver belt" should rest, with a beautiful imagination, gently fall in my neck, kiss me, stroking me.

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