想哭但是哭不出来落花飘零

作者:司徒又南人气:82更新:2021-07-19 14:10:02

      心里已经积压了很多苦涩,却始终不能化作泪水流出来。想哭但是哭不出来 ,心也就变得更沉重了 。
 
      从小到大,我都活在比较当中。别人家的孩子就是我天生的敌人,比他们好是应该的 ,比他们差就是我不够努力。明明已经拼尽了全力,取得了不错的成绩,却依旧只得到一顿责骂 。一次次的责备让我对所谓的亲情失去了期待 ,我渴望离开这个家,找一个没有比较的地方独自生活。
 
        长大一些后,慢慢明白了父母的苦心 ,可已经造成的伤害还是存在着。我不敢跟父母聊心事 ,总觉得这样会暴露我的脆弱,让父母更有理由批评我的不成材 。还记得有一次跟父母聊起小时候的不愉快,其实我并没有太多抱怨的意思 ,只是父母把我的话当作是一种控诉,不给我任何解释的机会,又是一通责备。渐渐地 ,我对他们失望了,一对不愿意倾听孩子心声的父母不能让我再兴起半点孺慕之情。和他们保持一段距离,是我保护自己不受伤害的方式 。
 
      随着经历的事情越来越多 ,我受到的伤害也在增加当中 。肆无忌惮地伤害别人已经成为别人自我保护的条件反射,我的软弱就成为别人伤害我的软肋。所有经受过的伤痛我都一一藏在心底,等待时间治愈这些伤痕。
 
      时间冲淡了疼痛的感觉 ,却抹不去心中的苦闷 。我的眼泪像是被别人夺走了,想哭但是哭不出来,痛哭一场就是我目前最大的愿望。

英译版本:

The heart has already kept a lot of bitterness, but it is never streamded to tears. I want to cry, but I can't cry, my heart will become more heavy.

From small to big, I live in comparison. The child of someone is the enemy of my born, it is better than they are better than they are not enough. Obviously, it has already made great efforts, and it has achieved good results, but it is still scolding. The blaming once again made me losing the so-called family, I am eager to leave this home, find a place where there is no comparative place alone.

After growing, it slowly understands the pain of parents, and the damage that can have been caused. I don't dare to talk to my parents, I always feel that I will expose my fragility, let my parents more reason to criticize my unencord. I still remember that I was unhappy with my parents. In fact, I didn't have much to complain, but my parents took my words as a complaint, and I didn't give me any opportunity to explain, and an over-blaming blame. Gradually, I was disappointed with them, and the parents who didn't want to listen to the child's voice couldn't let me rise again. And they stay a distance, it is what I protect myself is not hurt.

With more and more experience, the harm I have also increased. Unscrupulous hurting others has become the condition of others self-protection, my weakness has become someone else hurts my weak. All the sad pain I have hidden in my heart, waiting for time to cure these scars.

Time is diligently feeling, but it does not wipe the depression of your heart. My tears are taken away by others, I want to cry, but I can't cry, crying is my current biggest wish.

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