缝隙间的小丑,断简残章祭rain

作者:呼延水白人气:2828更新:2021-07-18 08:45:08

第一天·断
  我是乔克 ,虽然有人会直接叫我小丑——当然,我更喜欢他们叫我“乔克叔叔”的感觉。群内的老艺人告诉我,想要获得更多的门票钱 ,拥有更多的喝彩声 ,必须时时刻刻想出新的点子来哄这些“上帝 ” 。嗯,这话不假。
  让小丑来告诉你们原因吧!当我在台上失手时,快要把手摔断时 ,他们会觉得着小丑做作,于是哈哈大笑;但我不小心在跳火圈时点燃了马尾,马失控受惊狂奔时 ,他们会觉得小丑动作笨拙,于是哈哈大笑;当我兴高采烈朗诵亚里士多德或是萨特的作品时,他们会觉得小丑严肃庄重 ,于是哈哈大笑。
  所以我成了一个小丑,所以我成了这个城市里最成功的小丑 。
  我的日子越来越忙,我的内心越来越麻木 ,与之成正比的是观众的笑声越来越响亮;我的裤兜越来越沉,我的内心越来越空洞,有时竟将笑给忘了?也不知上帝或是宙斯是怎么定义所谓的快乐的 ,除了笑 ,哪还有什么是快乐的呢?
  看着雕有阿佛洛狄忒形象的闹钟 。噢,是“2014月2月13日”。
  我朝着窗外看去,整个城市笼罩在一片朦朦胧胧的晚霞中。艳阳的金光透过高楼的缝隙撒入室内 ,射在了键盘上,结束了我对美好夕阳的幻想 。
  坐在温暖家中,听着收音机里传出的歌声 ,嗯,是《烟花易冷》。舒缓的旋律中似乎有什么人在向我缓缓走来。
  “繁华声/遁入空门/折煞了世人/
梦偏冷/辗转一生/情债又几本/
如你默认,生死枯等/枯等一生/又一圈的年轮······“
古寺的长明灯该是彻夜亮着的吧 。又是谁在山门后的世界看透人间冷暖 ,看遍红尘滚滚,静静地看着时间的烟尘将过往的一切埋葬,连同自己今后的半生?
那些彩色大鬈发、红鼻子构建出的世界 ,竟给了我不堪一击的感觉。杂技不过是一种对社会的抗议,那些促狭的笑声在分崩离析的伦理中得到永生。
对着镜子洗掉了脸上的油彩,红的紫的白的化妆水从脸上蜿蜒而下 ,像是一场还打的降雨冲刷着山峦 ,于是脸孔恢复了本来的样貌,泪滴也不再是烟蓝般的忧郁,它变得澈清 。
第二天·简
啊 ,今天又是一个无聊的日子,但······也应该是聊胜于无吧!收音机里的《烟花易冷》刚播完,换下一首《雨下一整夜》。
眼睛移动到了墙上的闹钟 ,“2014年2月13日”,噢,上帝啊 ,这是真的吗,这不是梦吗?
“街灯下的橱窗/有一种落寞的温暖/
  吐气在玻璃上/画着你的模样/
  开着车漫无目的地的转弯/不知要去那个地方/
  闹区的电视墙/到底有谁在看······“
歌词让我想起陈启迪的一篇散文,迷途的碟 ,穿着白风衣的女人,孤独的绿色邮筒与一生中最大的那场雨。
纸伞宛转,午夜笛残 ,船痕破月 ,情思无声 。
霓虹微光,铁门冰凉,白杨影长 ,雨,雨下一整晚。
动人心魄的遇见之后只是平淡的活着或是死去。这才是真实 。
白驹过隙,像是曾经上过妆的小丑 ,在布满灰尘的剧院中焕发出过往的光亮,那也只是时间倒流,过去重现 ,但却只是苍白的背影 。像是老妇新妆,最耀眼的纹饰也只是欲颓夕阳的一点余光,终抵不过泼墨似的长夜与寂冷的风。
同一时刻 ,谁在夜雨朦胧的接头独自神伤,谁在温柔乡中你侬我侬,爱煞情浓?谁在竹吟森森的小楼霞彻夜怅惋 ,又是谁在郎情妾意 ,胶片定格?没有死撕心的痛楚,只是一点一点的感伤 、落寞,无言阶前一点一滴到黎明。
第三天·残
电脑屏幕亮了一整夜 。鼠标垫旁的马克杯里有咖啡的痕迹。听着《爱的飞行日记》 ,脸上是被泪水划过的泪痕,也不知怎么的,在恍然当中 ,不自觉的竟流下了泪,五彩斑斓的油彩妆花了我的脸,熬夜之后有点慧慧雨水的感觉。
但是看见网页下方显示的时间还是让我清醒了过来“2014年2月13日 ”!
我确信这一天自己在“昨天 ”、“前天”已经经历过了 。根据科幻小说的原理 ,我或许掉进了一锅不断重复的空间里吧,所以才会有一个有一个的今天?2月13日?
“赤道的边境/万里无云/天很晴/
  爱你的事情/说了千遍/有回音/
  岸边的丘陵/崎岖不平/浪入侵/
  我却很专心/分辨得出/你的声音/
我听着歌,心情莫名的好了起来。既然如此 ,既然任何一个动作自己都无法看见所产生的结果,那么今天就是去打架,下一个今天的时候这个是情感也被认为不曾发生咯?
那么 ,这个所谓的今天又意义吗?
想吹风 ,想自由,想要一起手牵手,去看海 ,满世界流浪······这些梦想都可以在“今天”实现,然后实现之后又在第二天无声地消失。
那么自己的所为有意义吗?
还是这只是一次给自己放纵心意的机会?
我拿起好久未翻的相册,简单的色调霞渲染着一张张曾经的面孔 。就像这个不停重复的“今天 ”一样 ,自己的过去于他人有意义吗?那么自己显然快遗失了的未来又有何支撑?自己的影像,人们介意认识自己的东西,在旁人看来却都肤浅可笑的。但在这下影像的下面是一片黑暗 ,无边无际,深不可测;他们只不过偶尔浮到表面,但其他人依靠这个 ,认识了一个崭新的他人。
哎,今天的“今天”总算过完了!
第四天·章
我第二天醒来的时候,窗外天色已接近正午了 。但电脑屏幕依然亮着。
我恍恍惚惚觉得今天和前几天没什么不同 ,但又觉得今天似乎有哪个地方不一样。
Curiouser and curiouser.
很干净的前奏 ,杰伦沙哑的Rap开场 。十年,我有些伤感时间 。
似乎十年前自己还是一个小学生,过着自认为超级简单的生活 ,看见喜欢的老师会更加用心的听课,喜欢在课间和同学讨论一些现在看来不值一提的话题。
所有的一切呈现出一种完善而美好的姿态。现在慢慢觉得喜欢谁都是自己一个人的事情,只要一直支持他就是完美了 。早晨的时间从哼歌换成听歌 ,从发呆换成学习,一切都变了吧。
E – N – D
后记:结尾是我想起了不断重复的2月13日的其他记忆,但我从来没有发现自己曾经被时间、命运完全的操纵。
谁知道我们是不是也是生活在一本书 、一部电影 、一段廉价幻想所创造的世界里呢?

英译版本:

First day ·
I am Job, although some people will call me clown directly - of course, I prefer they call me "Uncle Qike". The old artists in the group told me that I would like to get more ticket money, have more cheers, and I must always think about the new idea to come to these "God". Well, this is not fake.
Let the clown tell you the reason! When I lost my hand on the stage, when I was broken, they would feel the clown, so I laughed; but I accidentally lit the horsetail when I jumped, and the horse lost was shocked, they would feel the clown action. Clumsy, so haha ​​laughed; when I quickly recited Aristotle or Sarter's work, they would feel that the clown serious, so haha ​​laughed.
So I became a clown, so I became the most successful clown in this city.
My days are getting busy, my heart is getting more and more numb, and the proportion is that the laughter of the audience is getting loud and more loud; my trouser pocket is getting more and more sinking, my heart is more and more empty, Sometimes I will laugh? I don't know how God or Zeus define the so-called happiness. In addition to laughing, what is happiness?
Looking at the alarm clock with the Austrian image. Oh, it is "February 13, 201 on February 13".
I look out of the window, the whole city is shrouded in a slogan sunset. The sun's golden light is sprinkled into the room through the gap of the tall building, shot on the keyboard, ending my fantasy for a beautiful sunset.
Sitting in the warm home, listening to the songs from the radio, um, it is "Fireworks and Very Cold". Soothing the melody seems to come slowly from me.
"Bustic / Shot Empty Door / Folding World /
Dream Cool / Turning a Life / Love Bes /
As you default, life and dead, etc. / dry, etc. New Year Rail ····· "
The Changming Lantern of the ancient temple should be bright in all night. Who is in the world of the mountain to see the world's cold and warm, watching the red dust and rolling, watching the smoke of the time, the time is buried in the past, along with my future half-life?
Those the world of colorful, red nose, have given me the feeling of being hit. Acrobatism is just a protest of society, and those who have narrow laughter get eternal in the ethics of the disintegration.
facing the mirrorWashed out the oil on his face, red purple white lotion of the lotion of the lotion, like a rainy rain, so the face recovered the original appearance, tearful It is a blue-shamy that is blue-like, it makes it clear.
The next day · Jane
, today is a boring day, but ······ should also be a chat! "Fireworks are easy to be cold" in the radio, change the next "Rain down a night".
The eyes moved to the alarm clock on the wall, "February 13, 2014", 噢, God, this is true? Isn't this a dream?
"The window under the street light / has a lonely warm /
exhaling on the glass / painting your appearance /
open the car is a no-designed turn / don't know how to go to that place /
The TV wall of the downtown area is watching ······ "
lyrics let me think of Chen Qi's prose, the lost disc, the woman wearing a white wind, a lonely green postpoal and a life The biggest rain.
paper umbrellas are turning, midnight flute, boat marks sneakless, love.
Neon, iron, iron door, white, rain, rain, rain next night.
After moving, it was only diluted or dead. This is true.
Bai Hui smashed, like a clown that once made up makeup, glow in the dusty theater, it is only a time to turn, but it is just a pale back. Like the old woman's makeup, the most dazzling texture is just a little bit of light, which is dead, but the sky and the cold air.
At the same time, who is in the night rain, who is hurting alone, who is in Wen Fu Township, I am, love? Who is in the bamboo Sensen's small building, who is in the night, who is in Lang, the film is fixed? There is no heart pain, just a little sadness, lonely, no one drop in the prior period.
On the third day · The disabled
computer screen bright night. There is a trace of coffee in the mug next to the mouse pad. Listening to the "Love Flight Diary", the face is tearful with tears, I don't know how, in the middle, unconsciously flowing a tears, colorful oil color makeup spent my face, staying up late after night Hui Hui's feelings.
But see the time displayed below the page or let me wake up "2014February 13th!
I am sure that this day is "Yesterday", "God" has experienced. According to the sci-fi novel, I may fall into the space that is constantly repeating, so. Will there be a today? February 13?
"Equatorial border / thousand miles of cloudless / day is sunny /
Love you / 说 千 / 有 音 /
shore Hilly / rugged / wave invasion /
I am very concentrated / distinguished to get / your voice /
I listen to songs, my mood is inexplicable. In this case, since any action I can't see the result, then today is going to fight, the next time this is emotional, it is considered to happen?
So, is this so-called today?
I want to blow, I want to freedom, I want to hand in hand, go to the sea, the world wandering ····· These dreams can be implemented in "Today", and then the next day is silently disappeared.
Do you make a meaningful?
Is this only a chance to give yourself a heart?
I took a long time, I didn't turn over the album, and simple colors rendered a piece of face. Just like this non-duplicate "Today", is your own meaning? So what supported by yourself clearly lost? Your own image, people think about yourself, but it is full of skin. But below this image is a darkness, no boundless, deeply unleadage; they only float to the surface, but others rely on this, knowing a new one.
Hey, today's "Today" is finally over!
The fourth day · chapter
When I woke up the next day, the sky was close to the afternoon. But the computer screen is still on.
I feel that there is no difference between today and the a few days ago, but I feel that there seems to be different in today.
Curious and curiouser.
Very clean prelude, Jay's hoarse RAP opening. Ten years, I have some sad time.
It seems that he is still a primary school student ten years ago, and it has been self-simple and living. I saw the teacher who likes the teacher will be more interested in class. I like to discuss one by class and classmates.Some topics now seem to have.
All all have a perfect and beautiful gesture. Nowadays, I slowly feel that everyone is a person's own thing, as long as he supports him, it is perfect. In the morning, I changed from the song to listening to the song, and I changed it from the time of life.
E - N - D
Postscript: The end is that I remembered other memories on February 13, but I have never found that I have been manipulated with time and fate.
Who knows that we are also living in a book, a movie, a cheap fantasy?

Copyright jmser.net 鸡毛书 Rights Reserved.